May Day

scream

Can you hear me scream?
Can you hear them scream?
Can you hear the whole Canada scream?

It’s tax time.
It’s time to cram and fill in the forms.
It’s time to file personal income tax return.

I’ve lost my tax receipt?
How fast can you provide a duplicate?
What do you mean it takes that long?

Have a heart so it won’t bleed.

Revenue Canada was hit by bleeding heart.
For five days the system was down to protect us.
We still have five more days to file our return.

Relax and stop screaming.

P.S.
I think I’ll apply for a one way ticket to Mars.
Mars is starting to look good the way taxes are soaring.
The amount of taxes I paid to the government is enough
to pay for two cats to keep me company in the red planet.

Photo Credit: Thank you, Carl D’Agostino

The Evolution of Medicine

In Canada, I pay medical premium for a minimal cost.  The amount of taxes that is taken out of my income is about 30%.  That’s a lot of money considering my income is so little.  I assume the tax is used in part for the medical system. 
Sometime in the 90’s, I was hospitalized for 4 months.  Should I have paid the cost of hospitalization, I would become “mental” thinking how I am going to pay the bill.  I am grateful that it was fully paid by the government. 
My knowledge in medical system is next to nothing; therefore, there is nothing intelligent I can contribute to this post except for insane Medical Humour. 
The Evolution of Medicine 
I have an earache … 
2000 BC – Here, eat this root. 
1000 AD – That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer. 
1850 AD – That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this potion. 
1940 AD – That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill. 
1985 AD – That pill is ineffective. Here, take this antibiotic. 
2000 AD – That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root. 
Suggestion for the Automated Switchboard of a Psychiatric Hospital. 
Thank you for calling.
 If you are obsessive-compulsive, press  ‘1’  repeatedly. 
If you are co-dependent, ask someone else to press  ‘2’. 
If you have multiple personalities, press  ‘3’, ‘4’, ‘5’  and  ‘6’. 
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want;  just stay on the line and we will trace the call. 
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a voice will tell you which number to press. 
If you are depressed, it doesn’t matter which number you press, we won’t answer your call anyway. 
If you are a GP, forget about referring a patient because there aren’t any beds.  
 
Source: Humour MedJokes
 
This is in response to Daily Prompt: Healthcare.  Come and join us, it will expand your mind.

DP: Plead the Fifth – WHY? The answer is blowing in the wind.

What question do you hate to be asked? Why? 
Really?  What kind of question is that? Plead the Fifth?  Plead what? Plead the Fifth Amendment?  Is that what you mean? 
Plead the Fifth Amendment?  No way, I refuse to answer for this might incriminate me.  In Canada, we call it Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms, Self-Incrimination.  This is my answer. 
“Do you swear to tell the truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God.”  And then I swore on the Bible.  This was my experience as part of a Jury for 10 days.  A priest once told me when he is called on to swear on the Bible he refuses because he has already taken the Oath when he decided to serve God and mankind.  Of course, I forgot about this when I was asked.  I placed my hand on the Bible, and I said:“I swear.” 
It was quite an experience and an honour to serve Canada being selected as a Jury.  It made me think that the future of this man lies on my hand should I decided against the other jurors.  I was Number 8.  Mind you, we were given a manual on pointers on how to become a jury and how to make a decision based on just law.  No bias, no discrimination.  The jurors came from all walks of life.  One juror, in my opinion, was very fashionable.  She made sure that she is well dressed for the public and for the Judge.  This is not a criticism.  It’s important that we are dressed properly.  But once we deliberate behind closed doors, we have to divest ourselves.  Not our clothing, but our just minds.  We have to have an open mind without the probability of a doubt. 
We did reach a verdict.  NOT GUILTY.  Whew.  I was glad we came to a conclusion.  What was the case, you asked?  Joe vs. the People.  Joe was accused of killing his brother.  Just like in the Bible, Cane killed Abel.  But Cane was guilty; Joe was not. 
Back to swearing on the Bible to tell the whole truth; when I was a child, my Mother always reminded me to tell the truth.  That is so plain and simple.  Should you ask me WHY, the answer my friend is blowing in the wind.  (click to play the song) 
Tell the truth, try, you might like it. 
One Minute Meditation:
“Why is everyone here so happy except me?” “Because they have learned to see goodness and beauty everywhere,” said the Master. “Why don’t I see goodness and beauty everywhere?” “Because you cannot see outside of you what you fail to see inside.” || Anthony de Mello, SJ