I want to do boring things with you

A bore has feelings. Very often he will interrupt something boring he is saying to comment that he is a bore. His wife comes over and inquires sweetly, “Is he boring you?”

If he is, maybe it’s your fault. “Being interested makes one interesting,” Dr. Erich Fromm observed, to which I would add that you generally get out of a conversation what you put into it.

I’m not in favor of escape as a unilateral policy. There are painful, tedious people in abundance and some of them must be suffered kindly, maybe even until they run down and have nothing more to say. Things being what they are in the world today, we are more and more driven to depend on one another’s sympathy and friendship in order to survive emotionally…

Furthermore, warm, sustaining relationships become especially important during those periods when we are our least lovable. People bursting with good will and abundance of mental health are charming company; their need for ego-boosting, however, is minimal. People sinking into self-pity and depression are dreary, but they can’t get out of it by themselves. So every now and then, just sit there and listen, listen, listen. You’re paying your membership dues in the human race.

Source: Barbara Walters on How to Talk to Bores via Brainpickings



10 thoughts on “I want to do boring things with you

  1. There is some truth in the image you have. Marriage is not excitement all the time. More often, it is doing the mundane – caring for crying children, staying up when the children are sick, doing the daily chores, etc. All of those can be ‘boring’.

  2. Thanks Seeker, interesting subject, boring or negative people. I don’t like hanging around with people who normally look for the “bad,” in everything. This does not mean I avoid them all the time. Negativity is contagious but so is being positive. I cannot change another person but I can be an example for them to choose to change. Yes, I think it’s paying my dues wit the possibility of causing a change, I have to try!

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