January 6, 2013 Notes to file: On Peace

Returning from 2012 Pilgrimage, I applied something I learned.  I changed my signature sign off with Pax Tecum and sometimes added this characters _/\_ .   Pax Tecum is a Latin word for Peace Be With You. 
It was quite funny because some recipients do not understand what Pax Tecum mean.  One response I received was: Hi Pax.  Thus, my first name became Pax, last name Tecum. 
The vision of peace in my mind are those who received the Nobel Prize Winners on Peace:  

 I have attended a conference of Desmond Tutu and Dalai Lama once.  These two were quite humorous.  I can’t remember what the conference was all about.  I was more interested in bringing my good friends JGB and TXL.  JGB is a follower of Mother Teresa, Desmond Tutu and Dalai Lama but not a believer.  TXL is a follower of Dalai Lam, a Buddhist.  Where do I fit in?  It just happened that I love JGB and TXL; they are both lovely people who I admire and respect.  
As for Mother Teresa, I barely take notice of her until her death.  I was meditating then.  All of a sudden a thought came in “Mother T is dead.”  This thought brought me out of my practice and I asked who is Mother T ?  Never heard of her?  I was disturbed by this until later that night, a news flash.  Mother Teresa died on September 5, 1997. 
Have you heard of  the girl running naked during the Vietnam War?  When I was younger, I saw her on the cover of a magazine.  I can still picture her in my mind after 40 years.   She’s not a Nobel Prize winner.  For me, she is a depiction of peace, on forgiveness.  I found her on this site:  WordPress:Motleynews, Napalm Girl from Vietnam.   We are now both resident of Canada.  

 I am a believer on the Peace of God that surpasses all understanding.  I can only speak what I know about peace.  Actually it’s a question, never-ending question such as these: 
Do I blame others?  Do I tell lies? Do I harbour resentment or refuse to forgive? Do I hate anybody? 
Am I civil at work?  Am I polite?  Did I say good morning?  Did I tell the truth?  Did I say no problem at all?  Did I pick one good trait of another person? 
Do I manipulate people? Do I insult others? Do I lose my temper? Am I rude?  Am I irritable?  Am I ungrateful? 
Am I courteous?  Am I kind?  Did I let them pass through?  Did I bite my tongue?  Did I say thank you?  Did I use soft words? What was the tone of my voice? 
This is what I call examination of conscience.  A daily practice before I go to bed.  It’s so easy to ignore my conscience when I am guilty; a complete denial.  There is a saying “Honesty is doing the right thing when nobody is watching.” 
A story; 
We had our first winter snow fall of 2012 in late December.  The trolley buses were all stranded and not moving, all lined up just outside the school board along Broadway.  Well, in that case, I will take the fast bus, B-Line.  I need to be at the dentist in 30 minutes. 
When I reached the bus stop, it was crowded by commuters.  Meanwhile, the snow is piling up.  
There was this man, just a few yards away, talking to a young lady.  One cannot help but hear him talk.  His voice carried.  Here I am anxious to get to the dentist, starting to feel annoyed because of the 1) snow 2) late buses 3) the man beside me.  I am allowing the moment affect my equilibrium. 
Finally, the bus arrived and we all hopped in, squashed like a sardine.  Ironically, I was standing beside that “man”.  It was a long painful ride.  I have all these preconceived thoughts that this man is out of his mind.  I was scared for myself because of negative thoughts plaguing my mind.  I asked myself: This man has done nothing wrong to me.  What is my problem? 
I can’t breathe.  I’ve asked one lady to open the window and let the fresh air in.  She did and the fresh air helped.  Then I started breathing, in-out, in-out.  I closed my eyes and started praying.  When I pray, I could have a blank space in my mind, reciting the rosary, chanting Om Namah Shivaya, repeating one word “Maranatha”, or anything I can muster just to guard my thoughts. 
Then I started to relax and time passed by.  Everything became a blur.  I was lost in my world but still aware what was going on in my surrounding.  The “man” beside me became quite and I opened my eyes.  He was looking at me and he said: “You look so peaceful.  I like how you look.”  I smiled at him and I did not say a word.  Little does he know what my thoughts were a while ago.  Interesting comment.  I wonder what Peace looks like on my face. 
He got off the bus.  I found a seat and fell asleep.  Next thing I knew, we have arrived at the depot.  The bus ride took 70 minutes, I missed my dental appointment.  Not a problem. 
In short:  In order for me to be peaceful, I have to constantly guard my thoughts and examine my conscience.  Prayer is the best tool for me to be at peace. 
My mind was conditioned by so many: parents, teachers, family, society, church.  On conditioning, I have to unlearn what I have learned.  Some are no longer effective for it brings turmoil in my life.  Am I regressing?  Not at all, I just want to keep life simple and I am at peace with this decision. 
And I ask, how I can teach people to be peaceful.  I really do not know.  However, I think the children are experts on being peaceful as I share with you on this post: What Peace means to kindergarten students.  One thing for certain, Peace has to start with me. 

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16 thoughts on “January 6, 2013 Notes to file: On Peace

  1. Desmond Tutu is from my country. And, yes, he really is an amazing person. The most memories I have of him is of his laughter. (Yes, I also saw him crying and in extreme agony during our Truth and Reconciliation Meetings some years ago. Agony over undescribable pain in OTHER people.) What I carry with me though is the mental image of him always laughing. Laughter is from the gods.

    • Wow, lucky you to have Desmond Tutu in your own country. You are blessed. Here’s a link of the latest of Desmond Tutu. If you can’t open it, let me know. Let’s keep on laughing. 😀 😀 😀

  2. Beautiful post, Seeker. I love the questions you use to check your conscience. i also love the story. It reminds me of the Gandhi quote, “I have no enemies.”
    I have not heard that song in a long time, and it brought back some great childhood memories. Thank you.

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